Let me run this by my husband
One thing I have noticed throughout my years of service to women is this need to ask a husband's permission to spend money on something they need.
The key word in that sentence is NEED.
We don't ask for the okay when we drop a few hundred dollars on clothes or makeup at Target or Nordstrom. We don't ask for the okay when we want to get our hair colored or our nails painted.
We may have a conversation about the need to hire a cleaning service, but I imagine that is a very empowered conversation about how it is necessary and not a frivolous expense.
But what about spending money on things that you need but feel guilty about not being able to do yourself?
Two things come to mind here - hiring an organization coach and deciding to work with a therapist.
Both are a small investment (a very worthwhile one I might add), but something we feel bad asking for.
The good girl says, "out of respect, I need to run this by my husband."
But what happens when he says "no" or he inquires about the necessity of the service, then what?
Our energy usually changes dramatically and we begin to fumble over our words. We try to justify the service and the accompanying cost, all the while feeling judged by the breadwinner.
Not all men judge, but our perception is that he may.
We usually end up talking ourselves right out of the service because of a slight embarrassment that we had to even ask (the service provider and our husbands).
If you are a stay -at-home-mom, then I have a recommendation for you.
I want you to open the conversation with your partner about what portion of his salary is for you. It can be a small percentage, say 5%, or it can be a set amount, say $500 a month.
Just because the partner earns the money, doesn't mean that you don't earn as well. The intent behind this is put a value on your worthy service of staying home with the children.
There is an old saying that goes something like this, "The energy is different when there is an exchange of money." Each and every one of us will exude a different energy when we are receiving money for our service to others and/or family.
If you don't believe me, then think back to when you were a working woman. How did you feel? Now compare that to how you feel when you have to ask your husband permission to spend money.
Asking permission puts us back into a little girl mindset asking her father for $5 to buy a toy at the store.
Return to that strong feminine leader of your home - have the conversation this week!
